Best St. Patrick's day jokes

St. Patrick? He wasn’t even Irish! Wow, right? He’s actually a man who was born in Roman Britain, was kidnapped and brought to Ireland to be a slave as a teenager. He escaped and later returned to Ireland—not to drive snakes out of Ireland (which is a very popular myth; however, there don’t appear to be any snakes in that part of the world) but to evangelize the locals. 

Best St. Patrick's day jokes you should try out

In other words, for the past 1,000 years, the Irish (and the rest of us) celebrate the life and legacy of the man himself and the sacrifices that he made. The drinking comes in because the holiday falls during the Lent but exceptions are made to consume alcohol. And what about three-leaf clovers being a sign of good luck? That actually has a Christian origin too—it symbolizes the Holy Trinity.

Who knew?! At least now you’re well-prepared for random Paddy Day trivia.

Although in Ireland, St. Patrick’s Day still has a pretty religious tone to it, the rest of the world basically uses it as a time to get together, enjoy a drink or two (or 10) and tell a few corny Irish jokes.

So here’s what we have for you people to get into St. Patrick’s mood, some good ol’ jokes and the perfect green beer recipe.

Best St. Patrick's day jokes pot of gold and green beer

Traditional St. Patrick’s Day Jokes

Joke 1:

What do leprechauns love to barbecue? Short ribs!

Why are leprechauns so hard to get along with? Because they’re very short-tempered!

Joke 2:

“I married an Irishman on St. Patrick’s Day.”

“Oh, really?”

“No, O’Reilly!”

Joke 3:

What do you call a Cubic Zirconia in Ireland? A sham rock!

Why don’t women want to get engaged on St. Patrick’s Day? Because they don’t want to get a “sham rock”!

Joke 4:

There was a sign in a bar on St. Patrick’s Day: “Happy hour – all you can drink for $1.”

Murphy went up to the bar and said, “I’ll have two dollars’ worth, please.”

Best St. Patrick's day jokes cheers with green beer

Joke 5:

What do you call a potato that’s not Irish? A French Fry.

Joke 6:

Here’s a recipe for St. Patrick’s Day Irish stew:

Get some meat, some potatoes and a lot of Guinness.

Drink all of the beer.

Forget about the stew.

Joke 7:

What do leprechauns prefer dollar bills to coins? Because they’re green! 

How did the Irish jig get started? Too many drinks and not enough restrooms!

Do leprechauns make good secretaries? Sure, they’re great at shorthand!

Why can’t you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because they’re always a little short.

How can you tell if an Irishman is having a good time? He’s Dublin over with laughter!

Best St. Patrick's day jokes to tell your friends

Joke 8:

Paddy walked into a bar on St. Patrick’s Day and started ordering martini after martini.

With each drink, he removed the olives and put them in a jar.

When the jar was filled with olives and he’d finished all the drinks, Paddy started to leave.

As he did so, a curious customer asked him, “Excuse me, but what was that all about?”

“Nothing really,” replied Paddy, “My wife just sent me out for a jar of olives.”

Joke 9:

Never iron a four-leaf clover. You don’t want to press your luck!

What do you call an Irishman bouncing off the walls? Rick O’Shay!

That’s all the jokes we have for one day! One more thing. If you’d like to have a drink but would prefer to enjoy it at home, here’s a super easy green beer recipe.

Homemade Green St. Patrick's Day Beer

St. Patrick’s Day Green Beer Recipe

What you will need:

Steps:

  • Add a drop of food coloring to a chilled beer mug.
  • Pour a can or bottle of beer into the mug.
  • Drink immediately and enjoy!

In addition, if you’re looking for a snack to pair your delicious beer with? Give the Quinoa & Cheese Zucchini Fritters a shot! It’s one of our favorites and we know you will love it!

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

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